Week seven (almost eight) report card. I hope everyone is safe & well. This has been a very interesting time for us all, to say the least. The scope of which is yet to unfold over time… weeks, months, and maybe years to come.
In my past few blogs, I was sending out suggestions, (professional and personal) about how you might weather this storm while dealing with self-quarantine and social distancing. In most of my blogs, the word meditation appears. I always add it, or some form of it, to almost every conversation and blog. It shows up timidly behind other points and suggestions. As a meditator of over 15 years, and now as a meditation coach, I am questioning its role in my resource toolbox for myself and definitely my clients.
While millions of Americans are out of work and we all struggle to make sense of this time in our history, meditation and mindfulness practices just got a raise in my playbook. They have now become front and center in the quest for self-awareness and as a protective factor against dealing with stressful and anxiety-producing events.
This is how using my mindfulness and meditation skills have informed and helped me in so many ways…..
When this all first started to unravel in a real and almost threatening way, I instinctively knew that mindfulness was going to play a role in what was to come. I felt myself, (and it IS a physical feeling), go into protection mode. For me, this is not a shutting down mode, but rather an acutely aware, almost slow-motion movie of what is going on around me. I realized that this something I have always done in a crisis. I became very aware of the fact that a crisis is when I shine: I’m a crisis warrior! Days can pass where I might not feel completely productive or that I’m not getting much done. But give me a crisis, and I’m on it. This hyper-awareness made me realize this was a familiar behavior since the time I was young, growing up in a rather chaotic environment. However, now I can be with that, understand it, and be very aware of my current circumstance – responding in a calm and meaningful way.
My present moment awareness has also shone a bright light on the fact that I do not like to be controlled. Not by people, and certainly not by governments, (this is not political). I have always trusted myself and my common sense to make decisions about my welfare and what is appropriate. I am not saying in any way that I didn’t or don’t understand AND respect the need for social distancing for keeping myself, family and others, safe. However, my edges have been tested on the level of control that is felt in my daily existence, outside of my home. I had to meditate on why I was starting to get irritable about what it felt like to go to the supermarket and have to follow blue tape, always going in the wrong direction and having people look at me like I was trying to kill them! I have become really clear – I don’t like being told what to do.
The next point that comes to mind is my judgment of the herd mentality and this is strongly linked to the above point. Again, I consider myself well-read and thoughtful of external circumstances but prefer to make my own conclusions on how I conduct my life – not just following the crowd. I do understand the fear around the unknown, but critical thinking is very important in times like these. The point being my awareness of this arising, and working with it in the context of mindfulness.
Where I started to feel very uncomfortable and aware of my own anxiety levels was when I could not purchase things I needed, (or wanted, to be fair). The big item, of course, toilet paper. My family knows me as a stocker of supplies and when I could not have, what I felt was the proper level of stocked supplies, it literally made me anxious. With enough rolls of TP in the house, why was I getting so unnerved every time I rounded the corner to the paper aisle and found it empty? I would come home in a bad mood, and conversely, when I was able to purchase my “1 item per customer” and add it to my stockpile, I felt secure and calm. This is clearly an issue around attachments to what makes us secure and I have really worked with this – beyond the scope of toilet paper, naturally. Also, as a family, we also became aware of the fact that we do not prefer single-ply.
It hasn’t been all serious revelations however – there have been some positive learnings and realizations as well:
- In an odd way, I have enjoyed the forced stay at home as an opportunity to work on many things. Projects I have wanted to do but have never had the time (in a big chunk way) to devote myself to. In the past weeks, I have taken courses on video production, course creating, another meditation certification, as well as completed my new logo and design for my business. This crisis warrior did not waste her time.
- Remember the hair dilemma? Well, I found a work-around for that as well. I never thought I would be able to do myself, and it has been totally fine.
- My husband and I have taken MANY long walks and have ventured out nearly every day the weather has permitted, which if you live in New England, you know it has been close to awful – perhaps even worse than the stay at home order itself.
The takeaway here? My ability to use my mindfulness skills and make a stronger commitment to buckle down on my meditation has really helped me through the past two months. I have felt centered and calm, and when I haven’t, my ability to be present and aware of what I was experiencing, stopped me from heading down the rabbit hole. It has helped me remain balanced and in control. The essence of mindfulness – being with whatever life brings.
Because of this, I am bringing mindfulness back, front, and center to my coaching practice. This has been essential to my survival in these past few months and I know it can help you as well. I am going to do a month-long series on meditation and mindfulness. If interested, please follow me on YouTube, Facebook and Instagram.
Continued warm wishes for health, safety and breaking out!
Jean
